"Meowstic's Shadow" ft. After Darkrai | TRAINER'S EYE #113

Join After Darkrai for a hilarious, uncensored look at the Pokémon world, where they blend humor and Pokémon GO memories with their no-holds-barred podcast. Starting with Pokemon RBY and rediscovering the franchise through Pokémon GO, they now deliver a podcast packed with laughs and blunt opinions for a mature audience. If you're looking for comedy and Pokémon insights, this episode is for you! 

 🎧 Hear the voices behind the stories.
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Sources
Opening Song: "Forget You" by Alex_MakeMusic from Pixabay

Transcript

After Darkrai - Bret 0:03

I mean, I sound old.

After Darkrai - Hannah 0:05

You sound really old. man. Why are we, uh,

After Darkrai - Bret 0:09

Like dude, have you seen our car? Have you seen our car

David Hernandez 0:15

We're ready for president.

After Darkrai - Hannah 0:17

why are we doing it? Why are we

David Hernandez 0:18

Get off my lawn.

After Darkrai - Bret 0:20

got to sound raspy in your voice. This is my oven little child. Ahahahahahah. I've

After Darkrai - Hannah 0:31

doing I don't know. I was trying to

David Hernandez 0:33

what are we doing? What are we doing?

After Darkrai - Bret 0:35

I've

David Hernandez 0:35

I don't think we're supposed to be recording a podcast. we're doing here.

After Darkrai - Bret 0:38

in my throat. Among other things. Oh,

After Darkrai - Hannah 0:43

Whoa.

After Darkrai - Bret 0:45

you sound great Anna, for corpse.

David Hernandez 0:48

be for

After Darkrai - Bret 0:48

I thought we were doing the thing now.

David Hernandez 0:51

Me behind the dumpster in the hallway.

After Darkrai - Hannah 0:54

Brett likes to be in the coffins with the other, other zombies.

After Darkrai - Bret 0:59

With the, I'm in the coffin with the coffins. Oh, I'm when I'm wheezing right now. I'm wheezing, Pokemon reference. Yes. All right. We, well, that's

David Hernandez 1:10

Oh, oh,

After Darkrai - Bret 1:12

we, uh, tied it back to Pokemon.

David Hernandez 1:14

my God, I

After Darkrai - Bret 1:15

I don't know what the fuck he's talking about.

After Darkrai - Hannah 1:18

idea what's happening right now. I need an adult.

After Darkrai - Bret 1:21

Sorry, I'm just feeling a little under the weather. I was bitten by a wild Hannah this morning. Practically woke me from the dead.

After Darkrai - Hannah 1:31

Brett, I don't know what you want me to do with all of this. Because this is just ridiculous.

After Darkrai - Bret 1:37

I have brought you the items you described, Master. a magic wand that vibrates when you plug it into the wall. As you've commanded of me, Master.

After Darkrai - Hannah 1:48

need to keep your personal information to yourself.

After Darkrai - Bret 1:51

But you told me these things, Master. You make me your footstool at night, as you recall, for your bunions.

After Darkrai - Hannah 1:59

I'm questioning all of my life choices.

After Darkrai - Bret 2:02

all of our life choices as the Pokeball turns.

David Hernandez 3:20

Welcome to As the Pokeball Turns, where we interview people about their experience with Pokemon. My name is David Hernandez, today we are joined back from the dead, after Darkrai. Welcome back, from the

After Darkrai - Bret 3:35

David Hernandez, we have come for thee. The ghosts of your past, present, and future.

After Darkrai - Hannah 3:44

And he has regretted all of his

After Darkrai - Bret 3:46

Woe is your decision to have us on your show today. We will show you the error of your ways, and you will go, You there, child! What day is it? And they'll say, Well, it's Christmas, sir! And then I'll be like, No, it's actually Halloween! Trick or treat! And then you'll know the true meaning of New Year's Day.

David Hernandez 4:06

look, unfortunately, I, sacrifice a couple slowpokes, I sacrificed a couple Pokemon to get y'all guys here. You know, I'm hopin that I'm good with the Arceus and the Dragiratina's

After Darkrai - Bret 4:16

I think they got lost in the mail.

David Hernandez 4:19

Oh my gosh, I

After Darkrai - Bret 4:20

refrigerate them?

David Hernandez 4:21

I was supposed to refrigerate those?

After Darkrai - Bret 4:23

I mean,

After Darkrai - Hannah 4:24

Dry ice.

David Hernandez 4:25

let's try

After Darkrai - Bret 4:26

It's ice that's dry. Like my wit.

David Hernandez 4:31

Oh my

After Darkrai - Bret 4:32

I don't know. I don't know. Cut that. I'm not dry or witty. I always call

David Hernandez 4:37

Well, let me ask you this So well, let me ask you this So y'all know y'all have a hundred million listeners and earning more than five million dollars a year Was it difficult to for y'all to come back from the dead?

After Darkrai - Bret 4:48

Considering that we left instructions after our departure to our dear cult members, uh, as a means of resurrection, They didn't do a very good job. when we first came back, our voices were very hoarse sounding. And, for some reason, Hannah had a water bottle down her throat. We are not even gonna ask questions about that. But we're starting an internal investigation. there was pictures of my feet on OnlyFans. We don't know exactly what went on while we were gone. But, some stuff went down. But, yeah, we're back now.

After Darkrai - Hannah 5:16

Brett enjoyed his OnlyFans experience. Don't, don't make it sound like that that was an accident.

After Darkrai - Bret 5:23

yeah, we have 500 million listeners, like you said, but not a single one of them, downloaded a single episode. So they're, they're all subscribers, but no, but no, all subscribers, no downloads. No, no, no listener engagement.

David Hernandez 5:37

Is that why I see the white hand on your right shoulder?

After Darkrai - Bret 5:39

Actually, I did get engaged. You see the, the ring on my finger here? I got engaged to our, our audience, our fans. Yeah, I, this is a solemn promise to them that I'll never leave them even when they ask me to. they have.

David Hernandez 5:57

but what does it like to kind of come back? Cause y'all took a hiatus. You know, what are you looking forward to just as for after dark, right? You know, you're back.

After Darkrai - Bret 6:03

Uh,

After Darkrai - Hannah 6:04

I don't know. I'm looking forward to just actually engaging more with our fan base. We had a voicemail that we listened to, so it was nice actually hearing some positive feedback.

After Darkrai - Bret 6:15

We had a voicemail, uh. I know, you've never seen two people so happy to get

David Hernandez 6:22

a, voicemail.

After Darkrai - Bret 6:24

fucking voicemail machine.

After Darkrai - Hannah 6:26

It was it was exciting. Um, so it did like kind of essentially light a proverbial fire And, hey hanging out with Brett has been fun.

After Darkrai - Bret 6:39

lying, 100%. You, you, I know

After Darkrai - Hannah 6:41

Oh, you're

After Darkrai - Bret 6:42

like wired lie detector tests for celebrities.

David Hernandez 6:45

see the, gun on her head.

After Darkrai - Bret 6:46

the, there is a gun at her

David Hernandez 6:47

Yeah, somebody right

After Darkrai - Bret 6:48

come over there to do that. Yeah.

After Darkrai - Hannah 6:50

so it was fun when we did it the first go round and then had some personal things come up and Some medical things come up and unfortunately, I had to take a step take a step back and

After Darkrai - Bret 7:04

you were gone for longer than like even before we did the hiatus. Wouldn't mean Gracie did the hiatus, but you're back now.

After Darkrai - Hannah 7:11

I am

After Darkrai - Bret 7:12

She's back to atone for her sins. She's reclaimed her chair for the dark Pokemon gods, and casting out her screams across the airwaves for all to behold.

After Darkrai - Hannah 7:24

Yes,

After Darkrai - Bret 7:25

he is correct. No,

After Darkrai - Hannah 7:26

so Brett basically strong armed me and

After Darkrai - Bret 7:29

no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I begged her. There's a

After Darkrai - Hannah 7:33

yeah

After Darkrai - Bret 7:33

There's a difference between strong arm and begging.

David Hernandez 7:36

He pleaded. He got on down on two knees and threatened to jump off a bridge if he didn't come

After Darkrai - Bret 7:40

Uh, look, I felt so guilty, cause like, when we last left off, last time, on After Dark Rye, it was like Christmas, and we're like, hey, you know, we tried this Patreon thing, it didn't work out for us, we're gonna take a step back, the content, we're Onslaught like was a real burnout, man. Like it was hard. and then so we're like, okay, we're going to go back to like twice a month or whatever. and this will keep help keep us fresh. And then we said that and then we disappeared for like 8 months. So, I'd feel really guilty about that, and occasionally I'd poke a bear and be like, Hey, you wanna maybe, uh, come back and do a Pokemon podcast? And eventually, and eventually, she said yes. That's not from

After Darkrai - Hannah 8:22

yeah, that's that's not

After Darkrai - Bret 8:24

Yeah, just to be clear, dear listener.

David Hernandez 8:26

Or is it? Dun dun. dun. Ha

After Darkrai - Bret 8:29

That's not, it wouldn't be the first time someone thought that about us. She just, don't let her fool you, she took hers and pawned it. She said, Cash, she said, Cash is king, baby, and love

David Hernandez 8:41

We had to sacrifice something to bring you guys back, though. So that's probably why. Because she didn't have the

After Darkrai - Hannah 8:45

Yeah,

After Darkrai - Bret 8:46

The ring? Oh,

After Darkrai - Hannah 8:48

one ring? to roll them all

After Darkrai - Bret 8:50

Oh, or the ring, you watch that videotape, and Sadako comes. She couldn't make it, by the way, but she says hi.

After Darkrai - Hannah 8:55

hi. mom

After Darkrai - Bret 8:56

telling you, it always comes back to the ring. Hi, mom. my mom. Not your mom, David. Uh, although, uh, Oh, I apologize. Uh,

David Hernandez 9:04

okay. I don't miss her.

After Darkrai - Hannah 9:06

jeez.

After Darkrai - Bret 9:06

just suck all their out of the room out. Mom, I miss you. Uh, I know you're still alive. hi.

David Hernandez 9:16

right. Is she,

After Darkrai - Bret 9:16

Yeah.

David Hernandez 9:17

I had to sacrifice somebody from your family to bring out

After Darkrai - Bret 9:19

my mama. My mama. Fuck you up.

David Hernandez 9:22

oh, damn. Okay. She don't play.

After Darkrai - Bret 9:24

player, man. She'll run over you to go catch a Pidgey. She don't care.

David Hernandez 9:28

Oh, dang.

After Darkrai - Bret 9:29

yeah, we're back. We're, we're, we're here. We're louder than ever. And, oh boy.

David Hernandez 9:35

than ever. Oh,

After Darkrai - Bret 9:38

Here we are, screaming into the void. Ahhhh!

David Hernandez 9:44

well on that note, so, you know, I was my podcast and we're going to talk about a lot of Pokemon. But I want to ask this question to start it

After Darkrai - Bret 9:51

Are we actually married? No. Not literally. Figuratively, yes. I know. Podcast

After Darkrai - Hannah 9:58

Let's move on. Let's talk about

After Darkrai - Bret 10:01

Podcast co hosts, can't live with them?

David Hernandez 10:04

Can't live without them. It must be nice to have a co host though. I only have two dogs, but anyway, but Brett,

After Darkrai - Hannah 10:10

Dogs are better.

David Hernandez 10:11

you, They are their

After Darkrai - Bret 10:13

We all agree.

David Hernandez 10:14

So Brett,

After Darkrai - Bret 10:15

podcasts and just do dog podcasts. So my favorite breed is a mix. Uh, literally, because it's the best of all worlds, and they need homes, most of them need homes from shelters, so go adopt, don't shop.

David Hernandez 10:29

Please do. Yes.

After Darkrai - Bret 10:31

Or if you're like me, we just get them off the street, homeless animals off the street and then end up falling in love with them and keeping them.

David Hernandez 10:37

Oh my gosh. I wish I could do that. Otherwise he kicked out of my apartment or my abode.

After Darkrai - Bret 10:43

Your cave from which you dwell. I know you're back there iron manning a suit of podcast armor ready to burst

David Hernandez 10:52

I was, uh, I was doing a fleshlight, but okay.

After Darkrai - Bret 10:57

Hey, look, my hands are above the table Hannah. Don't look at me. We're on different screens Hannah We are not in the same room right now I know you she gave us a very

David Hernandez 11:05

he's right behind me in a different room.

After Darkrai - Bret 11:07

look and it looked like it was looking at me So I just wanted to

David Hernandez 11:10

Here's the thing, Hannah. He's right in the room right near us.

After Darkrai - Bret 11:12

look here's my hands and my feet. They're not currently

David Hernandez 11:16

How do you think he got the ring, Hannah?

After Darkrai - Bret 11:18

oh

David Hernandez 11:18

Think about it, Hannah. How do you think he got the ring?

After Darkrai - Hannah 11:21

It would make sense.

David Hernandez 11:23

Don't forget, Brett. I'm due for a good time after this episode, okay?

After Darkrai - Bret 11:27

what were you about to ask us before we started talking about dogs?

David Hernandez 11:31

Oh yeah. Hannah, if you're going to kill Brett with six Pokemon, how would you do

After Darkrai - Hannah 11:35

with, six? I get six of them?

After Darkrai - Bret 11:37

with sex? Pokemon or sick? Pokemon

David Hernandez 11:40

Six Pokemon.

After Darkrai - Hannah 11:41

Pokemon.

After Darkrai - Bret 11:42

Six. Sex. Sick.

After Darkrai - Hannah 11:45

Okay.

David Hernandez 11:45

me rephrase the

After Darkrai - Bret 11:46

Sick. Sick. Six.

David Hernandez 11:47

get, if you're, if you're going to kill Brett with Pokemon. How would you do it?

After Darkrai - Hannah 11:51

Okay. First I get Ditto.

David Hernandez 11:53

You don't have to use like a six speed, you can use whatever.

After Darkrai - Bret 11:57

dittos. The, the, the Hony Pokemon. That's when

After Darkrai - Hannah 11:59

Yeah, I get Ditto.

After Darkrai - Bret 12:02

And she could turn into a hot chick like in the movie. Remember?

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:06

that's not

After Darkrai - Bret 12:06

Detective Pikachu?

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:08

Oh, and you know

After Darkrai - Bret 12:09

You know that old dude in the wheelchair was bangin his ditto.

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:14

And I'm gonna give you your favorite one. You get Jinx.

After Darkrai - Bret 12:18

Okay, she smiles like a donut, I guess. Is it, is it Death by Snoo Snoo? What's happening?

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:25

Um,

David Hernandez 12:25

Pokemon snooze

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:26

no, it's just gonna haunt you forever.

After Darkrai - Bret 12:28

Death, Death by Swablu.

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:30

let's see. So

After Darkrai - Bret 12:31

Thanks, thanks Hannah.

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:33

what's the sword

After Darkrai - Bret 12:34

Can you, this is just, this is just, can Hannah name six Pokemon?

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:40

Yeah, I'm like terrible with naming them.

After Darkrai - Bret 12:42

Pikachu, Abra, you just do the rap in your, in your

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:46

what, what's the sword

After Darkrai - Bret 12:47

Squirtle, Kadabra,

David Hernandez 12:48

which one? There's a couple of them.

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:50

Yeah, Honedge. That's it.

David Hernandez 12:52

She's honing on

After Darkrai - Bret 12:53

Aegislash. LIVING ON

After Darkrai - Hannah 12:55

Let's see. I don't know. I don't know why I want to throw Klefki in there because we're gonna lock you up somewhere

After Darkrai - Bret 13:03

I hate Clefky as well,

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:05

Yes, and because you hate Klefki.

After Darkrai - Bret 13:08

you must have known that subconsciously, because

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:10

Oh, no. I know you hate Klefki. That's why

After Darkrai - Bret 13:13

think a lot of people hate Clefky.

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:15

I know you don't like Slowbro.

After Darkrai - Bret 13:17

do, I do like Slowbro. What are you talking

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:18

Oh, you do? Okay. Well, Slowbro.

David Hernandez 13:23

That was the pre Darkrai.

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:25

is

After Darkrai - Bret 13:26

to all of us, you know. Especially when you're young and inexperienced, you know. You shouldn't be ashamed of a little bit of pre after Darkrai. Hehehehe.

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:34

Bros gonna be one to help.

After Darkrai - Bret 13:38

But why?

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:39

you.

After Darkrai - Bret 13:39

What, is he gonna sit on me?

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:41

Yeah,

After Darkrai - Bret 13:41

gonna, dude, where's my car meet a death? Is

After Darkrai - Hannah 13:45

And then, what's the one that we did that had the pheasant thing? That had the nipple rings? Yeah,

David Hernandez 13:52

Oh, Venzapita. Yeah.

After Darkrai - Bret 13:55

That's just a meal. That's just a KFC bucket just waiting to happen. So I'm gonna choke on a bone. I want that secret seasoning, baby. Was that six? We're not a show about math. Like, don't ask us to do numbers.

David Hernandez 14:09

Yeah, if we got it wrong, then just send an email to Brett

After Darkrai - Bret 14:13

check our episodes, like the episode numbers, and it is bad. It is all over the place. Like, We didn't do episode 4 like a normal podcaster would. We did whatever the Pokemon we did for that episode, that was the episode number. So if it was like, I don't know, Mewtwo episode, that'd be episode 151, even though we've only done like 10 episodes or something like it. Although, I stopped doing that with season 2. We are doing 1, 2, 3, 4. And yes, I

David Hernandez 14:39

but it's more fun when you get it out of

After Darkrai - Bret 14:41

AI, uh,

After Darkrai - Hannah 14:42

did you do that, Brett? Cause

After Darkrai - Bret 14:44

mean, I can turn it back if you want me to. Do you know how hard it is when someone asks you how many episodes of your show you're on, and you're like, I guess 4, 000, because the highest number on the episodes is that?

David Hernandez 14:57

Dude, you have it easier. You can just spin the wheel and be like, Oh, we're on episode, uh, we just did three episodes.

After Darkrai - Bret 15:03

I do secretly someday, like, when we complete the Pokédex, and a gun to the back of this podcast's head, pull the trigger, and someone goes over and investigates the corpse. They, I want them to listen to the show in the order of the Pokédex, just for the sheer insanity of it. You

David Hernandez 15:20

That'd be hilarious. See, that's what I'm saying. You're missing out. You gotta go back to your roots.

After Darkrai - Bret 15:25

will complete that dream for me after I'm dead and they want to hear my voice for some reason. But let's be honest, they won't. They have no desire whatsoever.

David Hernandez 15:34

What about you, Brett? What six Pokemon would you select? Or what Pokemon would

After Darkrai - Bret 15:38

What six Pokemon would I slut? They're gonna make me some money. Uh, well, I wouldn't kill Hannah at all. She's a treasured and dear friend and I truly value her and I care very deeply about her. So I wouldn't do that at all. I would choose her six Pokemon to be her companions. Uh, Houndoom. Uh, what's pre Houndoom? Uh,

David Hernandez 16:00

Daur

After Darkrai - Bret 16:00

Houndour, we'll give her one of those. Uh, we'll give her, uh, Bagel Dog. We'll give her, uh,

After Darkrai - Hannah 16:09

that's not fair. You're not playing the game

After Darkrai - Bret 16:12

giving her, all the dogs. And she'll just be the happiest person ever. And I'll give her one cat. I'll give her a Litten in there because I know she likes cats too. So five dogs and a cat, and that's what she's getting. And she can cuddle up at night with them all. And be a happy little princess. That way No, no, no! No, don't boo me! This is the ultimate This is the ultimate mindfuck, because after she's murdered me, and then realizes how I did such a nice thing for her, she can feel guilty with it and carry it to her

After Darkrai - Hannah 16:38

No, I won't feel guilty.

After Darkrai - Bret 16:40

Mm hmm.

David Hernandez 16:41

She'll probably just use your corpse remains for something else.

After Darkrai - Hannah 16:44

Nope. Jinx is just

After Darkrai - Bret 16:45

I am not so easy to pit against my co host. We are a united front butt. United front butt.

After Darkrai - Hannah 16:52

I literally had Kev Klefki kill you. So, like,

After Darkrai - Bret 16:57

You should have thought about that before, you should have, you should have gone back in time and changed your answer, but now it's too late, now we know.

After Darkrai - Hannah 17:04

I followed the rules. I don't

After Darkrai - Bret 17:06

I follow my heart,

After Darkrai - Hannah 17:08

Oh, Jesus.

After Darkrai - Bret 17:10

and I, cause I have the heart of the cards.

After Darkrai - Hannah 17:12

No, because you're a kiss ass.

After Darkrai - Bret 17:13

banish you to the shadows realm, keep it up buddy.

David Hernandez 17:21

Well, Brett, since you know so much about Pokemon, can you tell us what were your first experiences with the franchise?

After Darkrai - Bret 17:26

Uh, nothing special, I was a little boy when Pokemon came out, because I'm very old. and I actually, I remember, how old am I now?

After Darkrai - Hannah 17:34

He's 52.

After Darkrai - Bret 17:36

sir. Sir, that is classified. as you know, as you can see, I have a lot of tattoos, and you're not allowed to get a tattoo once you're over a certain age. Like, you're just not allowed, you're not cool enough anymore. And I have officially become invisible to all women under the age of 30. So, uh, I'm somewhere there in that realm. my earliest memory is I remember seeing that original like, commercial for Pokemon, where it's like the kid gets on the bus to go to school and like hanging out at the bus or like all the Pokemon. And I'm like, oh cool. What's that? and then eventually, you know, other kids at school had it as well and I eventually got Pokemon, uh, blue. Was it blue? I think I had Pokemon Blue and That's it. That's it. That started the, the lifelong problem.

After Darkrai - Hannah 18:17

And that's my story.

After Darkrai - Bret 18:18

my story. Look, I said it's nothing special. I'm just like, 99 percent of these other guys over 30, they, they were kids, they played the game, they played it with their friends, and, and then at a certain point in your adult life, it kinda goes away, and then Pokemon Go just, just grabs you by the back of your hair, and Yes Daddy brings you right back into it.

David Hernandez 18:37

What about

After Darkrai - Bret 18:38

Yeah, tell us we're wrong. Say yes, daddy. That's how,

After Darkrai - Hannah 18:42

my cousin, well my brother and my cousin, more, more of the game players than I was, but I played Gameboy somewhat, like I had a Gameboy Color. My first Pokemon game was

After Darkrai - Bret 18:55

young you know she is.

After Darkrai - Hannah 18:56

But my first Pokemon game was game was Pokemon Yellow, and I have a picture of three of us sitting on the couch And we all have our Gameboys, and we have a copy of the Pokemon magazine sitting out so

After Darkrai - Bret 19:09

Back in my day, our game boys didn't even have color.

After Darkrai - Hannah 19:13

I had a Gameboy that didn't have color either so

After Darkrai - Bret 19:18

Back in my day, you used to have to smack the top of the TV to look at a pair of pixelated boobs.

David Hernandez 19:24

my day, you had to blow in the garbage to make it work.

After Darkrai - Hannah 19:29

Yeah, we had to do that quite a bit

After Darkrai - Bret 19:31

Did you ever use a GameShark to, like, catch hacked Pokemon in the original Pokemon games? Catch, like, MissingNo and stuff? I did.

After Darkrai - Hannah 19:38

see I never, unfortunately I never really got into it too much,

After Darkrai - Bret 19:42

Ooh, we should do a MissingNo episode.

David Hernandez 19:45

Ooh,

After Darkrai - Bret 19:45

it doesn't, it's not an official Pokemon. It's never gonna show up on our randomizer, but we should do one some, someday.

After Darkrai - Hannah 19:52

We could. Should? mm hmm,

After Darkrai - Bret 19:55

Could. Missing, what would that episode number be? Missing

After Darkrai - Hannah 20:00

zero, zero,

After Darkrai - Bret 20:01

an easy, come on, that was an easy joke. I said, what

David Hernandez 20:03

No, because that's

After Darkrai - Bret 20:03

MissingNo's episode number would be? Missing, because it's missing. Never mind. We'll move on. Cut that from the record.

After Darkrai - Hannah 20:11

But yeah, um and then you know, so I'm Stick to the original 151 and then they came out with more and they continuously come out with more and it's like, oh my god But of everything nerdy. So I'm enough to be dangerous

David Hernandez 20:31

Mmm,

After Darkrai - Bret 20:31

She can't drive 55.

After Darkrai - Hannah 20:34

No

David Hernandez 20:35

Oh, you're a slow driver? Mm hmm.

After Darkrai - Bret 20:36

Oh, it's a reference to an 80s song. I can't drive 55

David Hernandez 20:43

I'm barely just turned 22. So

After Darkrai - Bret 20:45

Oh, you don't remember the 80s. Yeah, that's fine. You weren't born. You're probably probably can't even vote yet Make me sick Let's hear your woke opinion. Uh, even though you can't even reach the ballot box yet there, whippersnapper.

David Hernandez 20:59

I know, right. I'm hoping to grow. I got one more growth spread ahead of me.

After Darkrai - Bret 21:03

I got several growth spurts ahead of me tonight, if you get what I mean. Ayy, something's gonna grow, and then it's gonna spurt. faked that, by the way. She's licking her chomp right now.

After Darkrai - Hannah 21:16

was, I can taste, I can taste the bile.

After Darkrai - Bret 21:20

She's like,

David Hernandez 21:21

Oh, it sounds like you've experienced it before.

After Darkrai - Bret 21:25

warmed up her feet. Real good for that one.

David Hernandez 21:28

think they call that foreplay anyway. So, you know, y'all originally started with gen one. So what was it about Pokemon that kind of interest you initially was just the fact that you had to catch thousands and thousands of creatures. Was it the fact that venture, like why stick with the franchise? Mm

After Darkrai - Bret 21:45

creature design initially for me, um, I just really like the idea of the pocketed monsters and I love their, well, I love most of their designs and I just thought it was fascinating that you could go into a different area of the map and find something new and it was just like a sense of discovery. It's still like that for the newer generation games, because as long as you're not spoiled, when you go into a new area and you see something running around the overworld or something, or if it's an older game that you just haven't played yet, you know what I'm trying to say. It's that Monster Design, love it, for the most part. Other than that, like, nothing else has quite hooked me as hard, I guess. Cause, cause a lot of the games are just kinda cut and dry the same, same thing over and over again until you get to some of the Switch entries.

After Darkrai - Hannah 22:32

I guess, to me, also, a big part of it, you know, is the nostalgia factor. Like, you know, kind of just makes me think of the simpler days.

After Darkrai - Bret 22:42

Glory days.

After Darkrai - Hannah 22:44

you know, just hanging out with my brother, my cousin, you know, we're just sitting in the living room, reading the magazines, trying to find the cheats to the little areas or, another thing I even forgot was. N64 playing Pokemon Snap, I know a lot of people like shit on that game, but I always thought that was fun. It was just relaxing going around and, cause like I said, I'm not very good at video games. I've just never really had the hand eye coordination with the video games. Um, if I'm trying to play like Call of Duty or, Gears of War. Like I'm trying to Defend myself and literally I get shot all the time because I'm just doing this everywhere

After Darkrai - Bret 23:24

And you know, in Gears of War, you're a bullet sponge. It takes a lot of bullets to down you, so, you must suck.

After Darkrai - Hannah 23:30

Yeah, I'm not very good. I told you! I'm not very good

After Darkrai - Bret 23:34

My, you know what, uh, to make you feel better, Hannah, my time has passed. I'm fine. I'm at that age where like I used to be good at video games, but now as new video games come out, I realize how terrible I've become at video games and how much of an old man I am to the point where I'm like, I no longer want any challenge out of a video game. I want my handheld, I wanna respond immediately. I want infinite lives. Let me see the story and get to the end of the game so I can feel like I completed something in in three hours. Because if it's hard, I can't beat it.

After Darkrai - Hannah 24:06

my big thing is Pokemon Go, if people really listen to the podcast, they're probably like, well, that, she's a, the basic white girl that does Pokemon Go, but it allows me to catch them all, per se, and then I get to go out, hang out with friends, and, Our group doesn't really get out as much as we used to. Like, we used to be all hardcore, gung ho, and every community day we were out. And

After Darkrai - Bret 24:30

Now everybody's busy.

After Darkrai - Hannah 24:32

yeah, hopefully we'll get back to that at some point. Um,

After Darkrai - Bret 24:36

do like GoFest and stuff.

After Darkrai - Hannah 24:38

yeah. unfortunately,

David Hernandez 24:41

So, you know, you talked about how y'all both play Pokemon Go. How did that part start out? Like, were y'all like day one players out there, like staying up all night or what was y'all's experience with that?

After Darkrai - Hannah 24:50

So I was literally, day two. So yeah,

After Darkrai - Bret 24:55

I was a day one player, but I don't know how much I played on day 1 because like there were so many problems with the game

After Darkrai - Hannah 25:03

oh yeah, like

After Darkrai - Bret 25:04

because so many people were trying to play it at the same time. It was hard to do anything. But as as that several days and first few weeks unfolded, like, it was impossible to not play where I was living at the time. I mean, there were just. Mobs of people everywhere walking around just playing Pokemon Go throughout the city. Like, you would think that there was gang violence at the park because there would just be tons of people dressed in blue and red and yellow. But they were all just standing around catching Pokemon going, Oh, there's a, there's a Bulbasaur over here! And then like 50 people would just sprint to the other side of the field to try and catch a damn Bulbasaur. It was crazy. It honestly, and everyone was having a great time, was having a wonderful time, and interacting with each other, and it truly felt like Pokemon, for a brief moment, could save the entire world. and that was truly incredible, and I don't think the game ever quite was able to Recapture that as time marches on right like sure people found dead bodies and And people did commit actual crimes by mugging people at pokestops like shit like that definitely happened but the the that initial feeling of Coming together was an incredible thing to be a part of. So yeah, I started day one, I joined team mystic because that's the best team. Um, everybody wants to be a little mystical if you know what I mean. nobody wants to be on team PP or whatever team time of the month is.

David Hernandez 26:30

Yeah.

After Darkrai - Bret 26:31

So yeah, join Team Mystical if you're not. Uh, that's the best team. Right, Hannah?

After Darkrai - Hannah 26:35

Right.

After Darkrai - Bret 26:38

Uh, yeah, and then, uh, after a while you're like, hey, uh, we're funny when it comes to Pokemon. Maybe we, this could be a podcast. And then, Brett, in his basement somewhere is like, I wonder if people make Pokemon podcasts. Probably not, let's just do it. Yeah, that was unfortunate. Just kidding, I don't own a basement.

David Hernandez 27:00

you don't have a basement.

After Darkrai - Bret 27:01

Never had one.

After Darkrai - Hannah 27:02

That's what he tells the feds.

After Darkrai - Bret 27:04

a crawlspace. I podcast from my crawlspace.

David Hernandez 27:07

You're a cupboard under the stairs.

After Darkrai - Bret 27:10

I'm very much the boy who lived, unfortunately.

After Darkrai - Hannah 27:12

No, it's in his murder

After Darkrai - Bret 27:13

me out of my misery. I do have a big shed back there. No murders have occurred in there in several

After Darkrai - Hannah 27:19

Murder shed.

David Hernandez 27:20

Oh, I just heard screaming. I heard a screaming voice though out there. You

After Darkrai - Bret 27:23

Yeah, I'm pretty sure. That's the ghost that haunts it.

David Hernandez 27:27

Oh,

After Darkrai - Bret 27:28

can leave, it just should be known. They can leave any time they want to. They just choose to not.

David Hernandez 27:34

Hmm.

After Darkrai - Bret 27:34

They just don't choose to tie the knot. That's what I'm saying. They won't marry me. And they just keep saying no. And I'm like, be gone ye phantom to the other worldly plane. And they're like, no, I'm not going to marry you. And I'm like, we're having two different conversations. I can't hear you over the spirit vortex.

David Hernandez 27:50

Oh, that's very cool. So if it wasn't for Pokemon go, you don't think you would have started after dark, right?

After Darkrai - Bret 27:56

not. I was doing a show called let's die the his versus hers guide to the apocalypse, the podcast. And that one is like, A different apocalyptic scenario with every episode, and we did do a Pokemon episode, and that was kind of the seed that would eventually become After Darkrai. and that seed exists there because of Pokemon Go. That's the whole reason, like, that episode exists, so. Yeah, without Pokemon Go, After Darkrai probably doesn't exist. Hannah, like, I mean, I mean, would we, without Pokemon Go, we wouldn't have done all those community events or, community days, I mean, is what I meant to say. Like, we wouldn't have done all those raid days together. We would not have hung out nearly as much as we would've still known each other.

After Darkrai - Hannah 28:42

Yeah, we would've still known each other and like, I mean, we still would've, cause we ran together and stuff, I mean,

After Darkrai - Bret 28:49

yeah, in a gang, we ran in a

After Darkrai - Hannah 28:51

yeah, we ran in a gang, but, but, yeah, and like, but, yeah. Meeting your mom and your sisters and your other friends that you've introduced me to, like, I mean, yeah, it's all because of Pokemon Go. So,

After Darkrai - Bret 29:05

real the reason we're here today turning the pokeball is because of pokemon go so thanks pokemon go.

David Hernandez 29:40

You talked about how Pokemon Go led to after Darkrai. What made you I know you talked about how like, oh, let's make a Pokemon podcast. Was there a specific kind of angle you're going before making after Darkrai? Like, What kind of show did you want it to be back when it first

After Darkrai - Bret 29:53

Okay, so, this is easy because we weren't gonna do, or I wasn't gonna do a show that's just like what everybody else does, you know, there's a, there's a thousand Pokemon podcasts that just resolve or revolve around like the news or current events in, in Pokemon, things like that, and that's fine, that's great. That's a lot of work that I didn't quite frankly didn't want to do so basically I'm lazy also as a young and unexperienced podcaster. I didn't know how to edit Podcasts easily for me to edit a podcast was really hard and really time consuming There was no easy like I was self taught. So I was like we're filthy mouthed. I'm not gonna be a I just I literally can't beep all these out if I wanted to so Why don't we just be the uncensored? adult comedy podcast because Also, I wanted it to be funny. Like there's no universe where if the show's not funny maybe we'll do a serious show as a gag. But it's got to be funny or else like what's the point? That's, that's pretty much it for me. Like, it's comedy first, our demographic is the people like us that grew up with Pokemon who are adults now and if they have kids and let their kids listen to the show, shame on them. and also that one kid that left a review on, on iTunes saying that they would get in trouble if their parents knew they were listening. Uh, that's, that person's also in our demographic. But by now they're, they're what, like two or three years older? They might be old enough. But also shame on you. Uh, go to your room.

After Darkrai - Hannah 31:20

But not really. It's okay. We won't tell.

After Darkrai - Bret 31:22

yeah, so, so basically,

After Darkrai - Hannah 31:24

We're the cool people.

After Darkrai - Bret 31:26

cool podcast, yeah,

After Darkrai - Hannah 31:28

But no, this is strictly

After Darkrai - Bret 31:29

peer pressuring you to smoke except it's listening to our

After Darkrai - Hannah 31:33

No, I don't condone that. That's terrible for

After Darkrai - Bret 31:35

I said it's like peer pressuring to have someone smoke when you smoke, but instead, it's a podcast instead of smoking.

After Darkrai - Hannah 31:42

But smoking's terrible for you. I don't

David Hernandez 31:44

but Gracie, coughing and wheezing are Pokemon. They matter. So somebody's gotta promote

After Darkrai - Bret 31:48

smoking matters, Hannah, because Pokemon need it. That sweet herb. They've smoked that sweet, sweet Bellsprout.

After Darkrai - Hannah 31:57

That's

After Darkrai - Bret 31:57

a, who wants a hit of that Oddish?

David Hernandez 32:00

That oddish man or that venosa, you know,

After Darkrai - Bret 32:03

man, this shit gonna make you weepin Bell, bruh. Like, you gotta take you some of that. Dunk, dunk, dunk. We're all about, uh, edibles nowadays, you know. I'd bake mine into a brownie and, and consume them. or I put them into my,

David Hernandez 32:20

I was gonna say, I, I

After Darkrai - Bret 32:21

or I'll put it into my Sinistea and drink that.

David Hernandez 32:24

The matcha,

After Darkrai - Bret 32:25

Yeah. Is there a Macha Pokemon?

David Hernandez 32:27

Yeah, there

After Darkrai - Bret 32:28

Well, what is

After Darkrai - Hannah 32:28

Yeah, there is.

David Hernandez 32:30

Sinish Shah and

After Darkrai - Bret 32:31

Cinnamon Twist, Poltergeist,

David Hernandez 32:34

Yeah. That thing.

After Darkrai - Hannah 32:35

Yeah, it's literally like a bowl of matcha.

After Darkrai - Bret 32:38

How do you, I don't know how to spell that.

David Hernandez 32:40

I can't even

After Darkrai - Bret 32:41

You know, we're not even gonna have an episode for that one just because I don't want to have to say its name.

After Darkrai - Hannah 32:46

Oh, don't be such a buzzkill.

After Darkrai - Bret 32:49

Oh, we gotta get that guy on YouTube who does all the, how to say the names of Pokemon on our show someday. I'm too much of a coward to send him an email.

David Hernandez 32:57

Oh, just send him an email.

After Darkrai - Bret 32:58

It's scary.

After Darkrai - Hannah 32:59

Or

After Darkrai - Bret 33:00

is this Nightmare P Pizza run.

After Darkrai - Hannah 33:03

one guy on YouTube that says things wrong. Like, shrewd and fruity. A shrewd and a

After Darkrai - Bret 33:09

What the fuck are you talking about? Are you talking about the guy that does like the countdowns number 10? The whale Lord Pokemon is the biggest Pokemon that there is, number nine. Sharpedo is a terrifying predator that also lives in the

After Darkrai - Hannah 33:28

I have no idea what

After Darkrai - Bret 33:29

You don't know what I'm talking about? Okay, well the people that are listening that know what I'm talking about, know what I'm talking about.

After Darkrai - Hannah 33:34

Okay. We'll

After Darkrai - Bret 33:35

What was it? Peach a runt? What is this thing? I hate it.

David Hernandez 33:40

Sinistra,

After Darkrai - Bret 33:41

S shin, shin esh ja.

David Hernandez 33:44

just type in like Macha

After Darkrai - Bret 33:45

I did, and it gave me peach a runt.

David Hernandez 33:49

Oh, that's the other one, that's the Mochi.

After Darkrai - Bret 33:52

That's, isn't mo I thought mochi and machi were the same thing.

David Hernandez 33:56

Apparently not, I don't know, I don't know

After Darkrai - Hannah 33:57

No, mochi is like an ice cream dessert.

After Darkrai - Bret 34:02

what I was talking about. What are y'all talking

After Darkrai - Hannah 34:04

Matcha is like

After Darkrai - Bret 34:05

This is like gangbang all

After Darkrai - Hannah 34:06

Matcha is like a drink.

David Hernandez 34:09

Yeah, it's a

After Darkrai - Bret 34:09

Okay, so I'm gonna Google T Pokemon and I'm gonna get Sinistea. And it better be authentic, goddammit, or I will send it back to the

After Darkrai - Hannah 34:18

Geez, Brett, get educated.

After Darkrai - Bret 34:20

Oh my god, fuck you! Hey, there was a Hey!

After Darkrai - Hannah 34:24

you, David.

After Darkrai - Bret 34:25

I used to know my Pokemon inside and out when there was 151

After Darkrai - Hannah 34:29

inside and out. I'm sure you did.

After Darkrai - Bret 34:31

Oh my god, here

David Hernandez 34:32

Knew him

After Darkrai - Bret 34:33

here we go, here we go!

After Darkrai - Hannah 34:35

You know, you like that

After Darkrai - Bret 34:36

Hannah's just gonna,

David Hernandez 34:38

Yeah. You know, like that Baneri? That Lopunny?

After Darkrai - Hannah 34:41

He likes that man time. There's

After Darkrai - Bret 34:43

No, that's you! That's you! That is you, Hannah! Okay, that is one episode I had to edit because Hannah was so Filthy, and disgusting, and borderline offensive, that I

David Hernandez 34:59

She was that Garbodor.

After Darkrai - Bret 35:00

I published that episode and was very uncomfortable publishing it, that I had to take it down. I I had to change the title, because, like, the title was too much,

After Darkrai - Hannah 35:09

You had to take that episode down?

After Darkrai - Bret 35:12

it back, but,

After Darkrai - Hannah 35:13

Okay.

After Darkrai - Bret 35:14

yeah, but like the title is now censored, like it, it was too much

David Hernandez 35:18

clustered his shelters and took down the cloisters you

After Darkrai - Bret 35:21

Hannah's the Mantine Freak

David Hernandez 35:23

It was too much for his onyx, man.

After Darkrai - Bret 35:25

Go back and listen to that episode and know that I had nothing to do with it. Except I'm complicit in releasing the episode. And, and I designed the t shirt. I can't find

David Hernandez 35:34

y'all put a t shirt for that

After Darkrai - Bret 35:36

about. I give up. I just get nothing but sinister. It's fine. A thousand Pokemon exist. We can, we can all accept that somebody doesn't know all the Pokemon. It's fine. Nobody cares if you know them all or not anymore. gotta catch them all. Fuck that. Like, no we don't. Like, no we don't. It's nothing to be ashamed of, is all I'm saying. Cause it's hard! You have to, you have to buy so many games. what, what, am I also expected to spend the subscription money for Pokemon Bank to move these damn things around, or home, I mean? Like, yeah, you are! And Just because I want a what? A Magearna? Yeah, I want a Magearna. I don't want to spend Whatever how much it is on home and then collect a thousand Pokemon and put it in there so I can get my Magearna. It's too much work. I'm not, it's not fun. It's, it's too much Inventory management, which I don't want to do.

After Darkrai - Hannah 36:27

Tell us how you really feel.

David Hernandez 36:29

yeah, go

After Darkrai - Bret 36:30

Fuck Donald Trump.

After Darkrai - Hannah 36:32

Okay,

After Darkrai - Bret 36:33

You asked, you asked how

After Darkrai - Hannah 36:36

we were talking about Pokémon. I didn't

David Hernandez 36:38

Yeah, I thought you're talking about Pokemon

After Darkrai - Bret 36:39

you asked how I really feel,

After Darkrai - Hannah 36:42

I hope we're gonna cut that.

After Darkrai - Bret 36:44

I don't know. Don't cut it. Leave it in. He's a traitorous psychopath to democracy.

After Darkrai - Hannah 36:48

I mean, we get, we get that, but this is Pokémon.

After Darkrai - Bret 36:51

No, that's fine. Well, you know, as the Mr, as the Pokeball turns, if your listenership is offended by that, they don't have to listen to our show. Please continue, dear Trumper, listening to as the Pokeball turns. Uh, we'll see you again after the break, after they cut me out of this episode. Doot, doodoo, doodoo, doot, doodoo, doot. Please stand by, we are experiencing technical difficulties. Doot, doodoo. They drag me off

After Darkrai - Hannah 37:18

We will return you to your regularly scheduled program.

David Hernandez 37:22

Right, right I

After Darkrai - Bret 37:26

and nobody else.

David Hernandez 37:32

said one anti Trump remark and it got canceled somehow

After Darkrai - Bret 37:35

That would be a trip, right? The anti Trump guy gets cancelled. Oh my god. Did somebody just fall over and die? What was that? Oh, no, hannah. We lost her. Oh god. It'd be a shame if somebody talked for her while she was muted let's do muppet voices for her Oh, she's back I just heard her laugh.

David Hernandez 37:55

Oh God, Hannah, we thought you lost you.

After Darkrai - Bret 37:56

a microphone getting chucked out of a window and then you're, you were muted for a moment

After Darkrai - Hannah 38:02

No, I went to turn my microphone up a little bit so I could hear you better and then like my shoulder popped and I'm like hmm, I'm glad I had it

After Darkrai - Bret 38:09

so we heard, that was your shoulder popping and not a microphone?

David Hernandez 38:12

I thought it was the

After Darkrai - Bret 38:13

Seek medical attention.

David Hernandez 38:15

Yeah, you might not have a

After Darkrai - Bret 38:17

I am concerned for your well being.

After Darkrai - Hannah 38:19

Yeah, that's like my ages. Showing.

After Darkrai - Bret 38:22

You're ageist showing. So you're an ageist. You don't like people that are younger or older or both.

David Hernandez 38:27

She doesn't like people, anything

After Darkrai - Bret 38:29

for her to like you, you have to be the exact same age as her, but she won't tell you what that is. So good luck, everybody.

After Darkrai - Hannah 38:36

Good luck, everybody.

After Darkrai - Bret 38:37

What is it with Pokémon lately and designing Pokémon professors that are just totally bangable? I mean, tell me I'm wrong. Think about it. Scarlet and Violet, they got Hot Professor Lady and Hot Professor Dude. Right? Uh, Pokemon Go's professor. Super hot. Sonia. From Sword and Shield, she becomes the professor. And she's the hottest of all of them.

David Hernandez 38:59

you don't think Professor Oak was hot? He had that salt and

After Darkrai - Bret 39:01

I mean, he's a Zaddy for sure, but that was There's a long You got a long gap between Professor Zaddy and Professor Sonia. That's what

After Darkrai - Hannah 39:08

we know what Brett's into.

David Hernandez 39:10

Oh, big time, yeah.

After Darkrai - Bret 39:11

You're correct. Madam. Thank you.

David Hernandez 39:15

think the only least one would be Professor Elm. I don't think really anybody would

After Darkrai - Bret 39:19

Yeah. That's forever ago though. I'm saying like

David Hernandez 39:20

He's like the simp of

After Darkrai - Bret 39:21

the new professors

After Darkrai - Hannah 39:23

robot thing?

After Darkrai - Bret 39:24

the fuck are you talking about? Are you talking about Pokemon here?

David Hernandez 39:27

AI?

After Darkrai - Hannah 39:28

Comes out in Pokemon Go.

After Darkrai - Bret 39:30

You know what's really gonna fuckin blow y'all's fuckin minds? Is that me and Hannah have been A. I. this whole time. We're A. I. podcast hosts.

David Hernandez 39:38

I had to bring him

After Darkrai - Bret 39:38

Welcome to hell, everyone! Art is dead! Art

David Hernandez 39:44

I put in all the after

After Darkrai - Bret 39:45

Uh, I just remembered what you're talking about. They're not a robot, Hannah. They're from another Dimension

After Darkrai - Hannah 39:50

Yeah, that thing.

After Darkrai - Bret 39:51

Special Forces or something. Yeah, but they don't look like that, like that's just like a helmet they're wearing. they're

After Darkrai - Hannah 39:56

It looks like it's Dubstep.

After Darkrai - Bret 39:59

probably fine underneath there. Just like Daft Punk

After Darkrai - Hannah 40:02

not Daft Punk. Thank you.

After Darkrai - Bret 40:04

they're probably,

After Darkrai - Hannah 40:05

I said Dubstep. That is not helping my age at all.

After Darkrai - Bret 40:10

Hannah, Hannah loves, she just loves to wake up and on her playlist she starts playing some wub wub. Some dead Maovivy?

After Darkrai - Hannah 40:20

Play me some of that Dubstep, please.

After Darkrai - Bret 40:23

Lemme some of that feller with the marshmellow head. What's that mad gentleman's name? Skrillex? Look, a wild Skrillex appeared. Blululululululululululullululululalululululululalululululolululululululullululalulululululullulululululul We got problems. It's the DJ Pokemon. DJ these nuts.

David Hernandez 40:49

what I was saying. I wish they had a DJ Pokemon. Like, uh, what's that Pokemon? The one with the purple? I don't know. Yeah,

After Darkrai - Bret 40:55

rain, purple rain. Prince?

David Hernandez 40:59

Toxicity.

After Darkrai - Bret 41:00

was kind of a Pokemon, if you think about it. He loved pancakes. I'm sure berries to some degree. He probably slept in a ball like a freaky little guy. Had multiple trainers. Think about it.

After Darkrai - Hannah 41:10

my stars, Brett.

David Hernandez 41:14

That went for eternity, Inspector.

After Darkrai - Bret 41:16

I gotta think, like, that's something that hasn't been explored, Pokémon's lifespan. Is it put on hold in the Pokéball? Cause they're, they're clearly conscious in there, otherwise, like, Psyduck and others wouldn't be able to just burst out whenever they feel like it. So, like, they're chillin in their Pokéball, does that mean they're also aging in the Pokémon? And then, like, also, does their lifespan, Similar to that of their trainers. Like, do they outlive them? Do they die super quick? Cause like, I don't know, a spider Pokemon is probably not long for this world. Like your Galvantula has probably got like maybe 20 years if it's a female and then it's toast. Seems like a bad investment if you're a trainer.

David Hernandez 41:51

I think time stops for them because, uh, I don't know if you watched the fourth movie, Lucario came out of his Pokeball and he thought he was still in the recording. The exact timeline of his trainer.

After Darkrai - Bret 41:59

yeah but I, I think he was stupid though. Uh,

David Hernandez 42:03

damn, dude,

After Darkrai - Bret 42:04

there's so much precedent of other Pokemon that just burst out of their Pokeballs, like when their trainer otherwise, just to cause mischief or whatever. Like, like Misty's Psyduck, he just sh or, or Team Rocket's very, like, Victory Bell would just jump out and latch on to James head.

After Darkrai - Hannah 42:21

But that's

After Darkrai - Bret 42:21

they must just be bored, because if time was stopped, they wouldn't be able to consciously make that decision that, like, I'm gone, I'm busting out of this fucking place and kicking the Poké Ball open.

After Darkrai - Hannah 42:31

but that's so like ethically, it's so mean. Like,

After Darkrai - Bret 42:35

Putting them in a ball in the first place? Yeah.

After Darkrai - Hannah 42:38

well, and then if time stops, you know, and then they open the ball, it's like, oh, you're not who put me in here. Where did my person

After Darkrai - Bret 42:47

oh, yeah, I'm their grandson, you're my Pokémon now. Yeah, you're right, Hannah.

After Darkrai - Hannah 42:52

it's like leaving a dog in a house and it's waiting on their owner to come back. Like,

After Darkrai - Bret 42:58

Can you imagine if Pokeballs were in the real world? Like people would ha Yeah, I got about 20 dogs, but I don't feel like feeding them today, so I'm just leaving them in their Pokeball. oh, cool. It's just pets when you want to have pets, but not when you don't want to deal with them.

After Darkrai - Hannah 43:10

yeah. What? Oh my gosh. It's Tomogachis.

After Darkrai - Bret 43:14

like, Ah, man, I really don't want to get up in the middle of the night to let you out to use the bathroom. Get back in your Pokeball! Dun dun! That's of my dog.

David Hernandez 43:21

And then you just see like news reports of 20 Pokeballs found with Pokemon

After Darkrai - Bret 43:25

Oh, can you imagine, like, tornadoes, sunken boats, like these Pokeballs that just get lost forever, the Pokemon are just trapped in there forever.

After Darkrai - Hannah 43:33

Damn, this took a dark

After Darkrai - Bret 43:35

This is the Halloween

David Hernandez 43:36

took a dark right

After Darkrai - Bret 43:37

All of those, do, do they all then become ghosts at that point, I guess? I guess so.

David Hernandez 43:43

At what point do Pokemon become ghost? That's a real question.

After Darkrai - Bret 43:46

Which also is, brings up the conundrum of like, are ghost Pokemon actually ghosts, or are they living creatures that can reproduce because they can reproduce with Ditto? Oh, did I blow Hannah's bra Hannah's brain just exploded.

David Hernandez 44:02

We got real deep into this Pokemon lore.

After Darkrai - Bret 44:04

F GIVE US HARD FACTS, POKEMON COMPANY, YOU COWARDS!

David Hernandez 44:09

We want the truth, are Pokemon actually alive or

After Darkrai - Bret 44:13

We don't need another Pokedex. What we need is someone to actually study these creatures and their natural habitats. I want a Pokemon biologist. Give me Pokemon National Geograph Oh, wait, that's I don't think Snap's a good example because you're literally like smashing through their environment and chucking apples at their brains. Hey you, do something for the, pose for this fucking picture and then just beans him in the head with an apple. Charizard jumps out of a volcano and goes, augh! Yeah, of course, they're going to react for your photo if you swack him in the head with a fruit.

David Hernandez 44:45

I would throw

After Darkrai - Bret 44:47

content we can do

David Hernandez 44:48

some tacos to me. I'll

After Darkrai - Bret 44:49

We could throw

After Darkrai - Hannah 44:49

Yeah, really.

After Darkrai - Bret 44:51

apples at each other and take pictures. I really want that to be our photo shoot.

David Hernandez 44:58

Oh

After Darkrai - Bret 44:58

Oh, come on, snap. Hannah's wearing like little Pikachu ears and I'm chucking an apple at her.

After Darkrai - Hannah 45:05

We need to write this down.

After Darkrai - Bret 45:06

not going to.

David Hernandez 45:07

But I want to play a game and it's

After Darkrai - Bret 45:10

game. Do you wanna play a

David Hernandez 45:11

you want to play a game

After Darkrai - Hannah 45:13

Let's, let's play a game.

David Hernandez 45:16

it's called what's that Pokemon?

After Darkrai - Bret 45:24

What's that? Pokemon!

After Darkrai - Hannah 45:27

that Pokemon?

After Darkrai - Bret 45:28

Da da da! I wanna be the

David Hernandez 45:31

the very best like No

After Darkrai - Bret 45:34

one ever was as

David Hernandez 45:37

dear friends, to train them is my goal.

After Darkrai - Bret 45:41

was.

David Hernandez 45:41

catch em all! Ha ha ha ha, yes master, I

After Darkrai - Bret 45:45

she kept it going. Gotta catch them all, master. I've caught them

David Hernandez 45:51

gotta catch em all. gotta catch em all. little

After Darkrai - Bret 45:53

and this is my brother, Begor. We're here for you, master.

David Hernandez 45:58

So, we're training the podcast is 1, 000 Pokemon. Where there are only 1, 000 Pokemon. But the only one that matters is the one I'm thinking about.

After Darkrai - Hannah 46:07

Okay, oh

David Hernandez 46:09

is y'all have to guess which Pokemon that I'm thinking

After Darkrai - Bret 46:12

Do we get to

David Hernandez 46:13

can ask this 10 questions in a yes or no format. After the 10 questions, you have to guess which Pokemon I'm thinking of based on what information you gathered. And because this is Pokemon, if you fail to do

After Darkrai - Bret 46:26

we have to cut off our hands?

After Darkrai - Hannah 46:31

No,

After Darkrai - Bret 46:33

That is a conflict of interest. Like, we might not have one. We sold our souls to Ken from Lured Up. What's up, bruddy? What's up? What's up, daddy? Daddy Ken? All right. Hannah, do you want to go first? You want me to go first?

After Darkrai - Hannah 46:45

um

After Darkrai - Bret 46:54

I got one if you don't have one.

After Darkrai - Hannah 46:55

Okay, go first.

After Darkrai - Bret 46:57

many legs does the Pokemon have? Oh, come on!

After Darkrai - Hannah 47:01

Yeah, getting ready to say I think it's yeah, I think it's yes or no

After Darkrai - Bret 47:11

has more than two legs. More than it has more than two legs. So three or more. I got three myself.

After Darkrai - Hannah 47:28

so it's a bipedal

After Darkrai - Bret 47:30

Maybe. There are Pokemon that have no legs, though.

David Hernandez 47:33

Hannah, representation matters. Some Pokemon don't have

After Darkrai - Bret 47:37

And, and how dare you. I would say walk a

David Hernandez 47:39

That's

After Darkrai - Bret 47:40

but they don't have shoes, and that would be wrong.

After Darkrai - Hannah 47:43

Okay question number two Can the Pokemon be male or female.

After Darkrai - Bret 47:51

What the fuck does that mean?

After Darkrai - Hannah 47:53

Well, there's other

After Darkrai - Bret 47:55

that's like 99 percent of the Pokemon!

After Darkrai - Hannah 47:57

it's not!

After Darkrai - Bret 47:59

I mean, there's a bunch that are male only, and a bunch that are female only, and a bunch, some that have like no gender, but the vast majority of be male or female, you're, there's a way to word that that makes, that us out more,

David Hernandez 48:09

So your question is can they be either

After Darkrai - Hannah 48:21

Right. Okay, so let me word this differently then. Um,

David Hernandez 48:30

No, you already said

After Darkrai - Hannah 48:30

okay.

David Hernandez 48:39

Yes. the Pokemon can be male or female.

After Darkrai - Bret 48:42

it down. It's not

David Hernandez 48:44

question number

After Darkrai - Bret 48:49

Question number three. Okay, okay, okay, okay. I think, I think Hannah it would help if we tried to narrow down some of the types.

After Darkrai - Hannah 48:56

Okay.

After Darkrai - Bret 48:57

that could actually cut out, I think, a lot of options

After Darkrai - Hannah 49:00

That's a good idea.

After Darkrai - Bret 49:02

Pokemon in question have More than one type.

David Hernandez 49:16

It does not have more than one

After Darkrai - Bret 49:21

So it's, so, okay. So we can mark off things like Charizard and stuff like that. Because it's only got one type. Great.

David Hernandez 49:35

four

After Darkrai - Hannah 49:36

number four. So, then, Brett, we need to So, it's one type.

After Darkrai - Bret 49:45

Right. I got, I got my next question already lined up. Pew pew!

After Darkrai - Hannah 49:50

Is it a dark type Pokemon?

After Darkrai - Bret 49:53

Very specific, Hannah. Very specific. Well, there's only 30 more types to go. Uh. Hannah. So, my question

David Hernandez 50:30

And the shadows are up.

After Darkrai - Bret 50:31

is, does this Pokémon have two or more evolution stages? Two or more. So that means it goes from the base form, and then it can go to the poppy form.

After Darkrai - Hannah 51:02

Or it may not even have a base. May not even

After Darkrai - Bret 51:05

Oh yeah, it could, it could, it could just have not have an evolution as

After Darkrai - Hannah 51:11

Is this a legendary Pokemon? Brett's a lot more technical than I am.

After Darkrai - Bret 51:39

I'm I'm I'm running as the wells running dry. Thank God. He didn't say we had 10 each cause there's no way I could have

After Darkrai - Hannah 51:45

Oh, I know.

After Darkrai - Bret 51:46

it's hard enough just to get to think of any more, is the Pokemon. Is the Pokemon from, I'm trying to think of how to word this, Is this Pokemon from the newer generation of Pokemon games on the Switch? That's my question. knew he was gonna do that. I, I, I knew he was feeding us those was gonna say, It is dot, dot, dot, not go fuck yourself. Okay, so that means it's in, it's from the like, original ish games on, Your old Game Boy Color hanging out,

After Darkrai - Hannah 52:52

Okay.

After Darkrai - Bret 53:01

I I got fucking nothing! I got nothing! I got nothing! Oh my god.

David Hernandez 53:09

And so far, nobody's failed this yet.

After Darkrai - Bret 53:18

Nobody's failed this game yet?

David Hernandez 53:21

Uh uh.

After Darkrai - Bret 53:21

We're f We suck. We suck so bad. I'm Googling Pokemon with no legs. Heheheheh.

David Hernandez 53:30

ha ha

After Darkrai - Hannah 53:30

So I'm, I'm just gonna throw this. Is this part of the Kanto region?

After Darkrai - Bret 53:38

Very specific. Okay, that narrows out one. Like, if you, if it was from Kanto, then that would have been a jackpot question,

After Darkrai - Hannah 54:05

Oh, I know. I took a shot

After Darkrai - Bret 54:06

yeah, I applaud it, but because it's not from Kanto, that means we just have like six more games we gotta try figure this out. Alright, my last

David Hernandez 54:16

question,

After Darkrai - Bret 54:17

yeah, I'm just gonna ask. Is the Pokemon fire, water, or grass? Thanks.

David Hernandez 54:33

Is the Pokemon I'm thinking of either a fire, water, or grass

After Darkrai - Bret 54:37

Yes. Like the starters.

David Hernandez 54:42

It is

After Darkrai - Bret 54:44

So it's fire, water, or gra You bastard! bastard!

David Hernandez 54:49

water type.

After Darkrai - Bret 54:50

So it's not fire, water, grass, or dark. It has less than three legs. It's not from Kanto, Sword, Shield, Scarlet, Violet, whatever that other game was. Um, and uh, yeah, we're boned.

After Darkrai - Hannah 55:07

So Brett, we're saying it's not a starter Pokemon.

After Darkrai - Bret 55:10

It can't be.

After Darkrai - Hannah 55:11

Okay.

After Darkrai - Bret 55:12

Just because it's not fire, water, or grass, so it can't be that.

David Hernandez 55:17

a sacrifice after dark, right? You've got one more question

After Darkrai - Bret 55:22

oh. We do. Oh, I thought we were, I thought that was our last one.

David Hernandez 55:38

It's off to Gracie. Can she ask the right question?

After Darkrai - Hannah 55:43

Okay. I don't know what you want me to ask. I'm so nervous. You want me to?

After Darkrai - Bret 55:49

I mean, I mean, let's be honest, you could just like whittle it down and just ask if it's like another type or, yeah, that's all I got. Or you could ask if it has no legs or two legs. Because there's no shot it only has one leg, right? I'm sure there's a Pokemon that has only got one leg that I can't think of. Like, even Hoothoot has two legs, he's just only showing one at a time.

After Darkrai - Hannah 56:12

Okay.

After Darkrai - Bret 56:12

Hoothoot? No, that's not the question. That's not the question, don't answer that.

After Darkrai - Hannah 56:19

Okay. Um, let's see. Not a dirt, not a grass, can't do, no.

After Darkrai - Bret 56:27

not legendary. And we will reveal the answer after these messages next week. See you then, trainers.

David Hernandez 56:43

Will our heroes be able to figure out the

After Darkrai - Bret 56:45

Heroes is generous.

David Hernandez 56:47

I don't know what else to call you guys. Will our degenerates figure out

After Darkrai - Bret 56:50

more like the venom of the Pokemon podcast world. We say naughty words people out.

After Darkrai - Hannah 56:57

Okay. Um,

After Darkrai - Bret 56:59

Nobody's picked up on that.

After Darkrai - Hannah 57:00

I don't know if I'm going to ask a region or if I want to ask a type. Brett, should I ask a type?

After Darkrai - Bret 57:06

I, do the type, yeah. the type, because if you nail it, then, then that can help tremendously.

After Darkrai - Hannah 57:12

Okay. Is it a rock type Pokemon?

David Hernandez 57:24

Is the Pokemon I'm thinking of

After Darkrai - Bret 57:26

Rock type Pokémon are from Kanto, so this can't be

After Darkrai - Hannah 57:30

Are you,

After Darkrai - Bret 57:37

Yeah, not,

After Darkrai - Hannah 57:38

are you being serious

After Darkrai - Bret 57:39

done that to us like eight times, not. I knew as soon as he said it, it is. We haven't gotten a single question right, Hannah! It's always a long pause and then NELP! I know what my guess I got, I I just pick it

David Hernandez 57:53

Well, you only get one guess between each

After Darkrai - Bret 57:55

That's fine, I, I, can I go ahead and guess? It's Misdreavus.

After Darkrai - Hannah 58:01

I'll agree with Brett.

After Darkrai - Bret 58:04

All of that research, she's looking at her phone, and she's like, fuck it. Brett's about as close as either of us will be.

David Hernandez 58:14

Why Misdreavus out of curiosity?

After Darkrai - Bret 58:15

it's the first thing I saw that had less than two, less than three legs. Uh, it's not any of the types. It's not from Kanto. it's not legendary. And it's Halloween. Spooky season.

David Hernandez 58:27

Mmm,

After Darkrai - Bret 58:28

or female.

David Hernandez 58:29

that would be crazy

After Darkrai - Bret 58:31

would be crazy if we roundabout somehow magically guessed. I will, I will throw my headset through the window. I will gronk spike it into the ground into a thousand pieces if I'm correct. And if I'm wrong, I'll kill myself. So you choose next words wisely, sir.

David Hernandez 58:49

Do you act like I have skin in this game?

After Darkrai - Bret 58:52

He put this episode on the dark web, Pokemon fan, kill self,

David Hernandez 58:59

That would be the title of the episode maybe

After Darkrai - Bret 59:01

and captions, what else is new?

David Hernandez 59:04

So the guess is Misdreavus. that right?

After Darkrai - Bret 59:07

correct. Hannah could cast a wider net for us by guessing a second Pokemon, but she also chose Misdreavus. She's doubling down on failure.

David Hernandez 59:17

The answer,

After Darkrai - Bret 59:18

I'm gonna be really upset if it's not Snowman Dairumaka.

David Hernandez 59:22

It was Meow Stick.

After Darkrai - Bret 59:24

Oh, one favorite Pokemon of all time.

David Hernandez 59:28

Yep. And I know Hannah Lights cats.

After Darkrai - Hannah 59:30

Yep.

After Darkrai - Bret 59:31

my favorite Pokemon of all time,

After Darkrai - Hannah 59:33

I should have asked if it was a psychic Pokemon.

After Darkrai - Bret 59:38

no! I can feel him sucking soul out right now!

David Hernandez 59:42

now y'all both get banished to the void

After Darkrai - Bret 59:46

was sucking our souls, Hannah. He's sucking it so good!

David Hernandez 59:54

Thank you for listening to As the Pokeball Turns. Follow all my socials and join our Discord community to stay connected by clicking any of the links in the description of this episode. Tune in next time for more episodes featuring more people, more stories, and more Pokemon. Until next time.